Award-winning author and one of social media’s biggest influencers is opening up about why her beauty and fame are not enough to find – and keep – a man.
On a recent episode of the hit podcast, The Pregame Show, Brittany Renner, 30, admitted that she used unhealthy mechanisms to numb the pain she faced in relationships and said she had to learn how to “sit with my s*hit.”
“I know what it’s like to be desired by men. I don’t know what it’s like to be valued by one,” she divulged. “When people ask me, why hasn’t it worked out with anyone? Well, because I’ve never valued myself. I’ve been running from myself for a very long time. And I’m no longer drinking it away, eating it away, sleeping it away, f**king it away. I’m sitting with my shit.”
She further went on to explain that she’s had to have difficult conversations with herself and start behaving in a way that would attract the man she wanted.
“Anything you attract from a disempowered state won’t last,” she said.
The Mississippi-born influencer, whose Judge This Cover book reverberated across the nation for its candid and transparent conversations around sexual freedom, motherhood, life and love, confessed that she regrets some of the men she’s slept with. She added that if she could turn back the hands of time, she would have made different choices.
“And people that I shared my body with, when I think about my list, it’s repulsive because they didn’t deserve it, but that was an outcome of me discounting my worth. And it’s disgusting. I hate even having that spiritual tie in any type of way, but yeah I would absolutely change sexually how I move around.”
She continued: “It doesn’t feel good knowing that you gave a sacred part of yourself to a man that looked at sex with you like taking a piss. It’s not fulfilling, it’s disgusting to think about, and I feel like I’ve beat myself up every single day for my decisions. And what people say about me online holds no candle to what I’ve told myself on a daily basis. I’ve been called worse by better and that better being me.”
