Award-winning actress Sheryl Lee Ralph delivered a message of self-determination during a conversation at the TIME Women of the Year Leadership Forum, encouraging women to create their own opportunities rather than waiting for acceptance from established power structures.
Speaking with author and podcast host Mel Robbins in Los Angeles, Ralph reflected on the decades-long path that led to her recent wave of recognition in Hollywood.
“Why are you waiting trying to get to somebody else’s table? Buy your own table. Build your own table, put up a seat, and sit at your own table,” Ralph said during the forum discussion.
A Career Built Over Decades
Ralph, who stars as Barbara Howard on the hit ABC sitcom Abbott Elementary, said her rise to widespread public acclaim came after more than 40 years in the entertainment industry.
Her role on the series helped earn her major honors, including an Emmy Award, a Critics’ Choice Award, and national recognition as a recipient of the Order of Jamaica. She has also been named among TIME’s Women of the Year.
Ralph told attendees that perseverance and self-belief were essential in an industry where she was often told there was limited space for Black women.
To stay motivated, she said she keeps a sign in her bedroom that reads: “Underestimate me, that will be interesting.”
Rejecting Comparisons
During the conversation, Ralph said that comparing oneself to others can undermine confidence and distract from personal growth.
“When you compare and you compete, there’s only one person that loses,” she said.
Ralph noted that over the years she had sometimes wished she had the success or career path of other people, only to later realize she was grateful for her own journey.
Instead, she stressed the importance of focusing on personal progress and recognizing individual achievements.
Message to Women Leaders
Ralph also addressed women increasingly moving into leadership roles across industries. She encouraged them to avoid replicating the negative behaviors sometimes seen in male-dominated leadership structures.
“For a few hundred years now, women have been under the thumb of the patriarchy,” Ralph said. “When we get to the top, we must be better than what was before us.”
The discussion highlighted themes of persistence, self-confidence, and leadership, as both Ralph and Robbins reflected on careers that took years of setbacks and gradual progress before achieving widespread recognition.
For Ralph, the key lesson is simple: success often comes to those willing to invest in themselves and create their own path forward.
